I finally had to admit
To the doctor I should go.
So up to town I hobbled
To show him my sore toe.

Drs. Alford and Stewart
Were the names upon the door.
Both had treated me for years
For measles, mumps and more.

Mother did her best to heal us
With mustard plasters and other stuff.
But there always came the time
When that was just not enough.

So, off to the doctor we would go
And things soon would be put right.
But sometimes mother had to call
For them to come by at night.

Dr. Alford was the one who said
"Well, James, take off your shoe.
Show me where you hurt,
And I'll see what I can do."

"It’s my big toe" is what I said,
"The nail is ingrown pretty bad".
He poked and prodded, saying
"Yes, it is looking rather sad".

"I'll have to cut it out
And its going to hurt a bit."
Well, I winced, but it was okay.
And my shoe was certainly a better fit.

When I asked him what I owed
He looked in a little book
And in a moment his face
Took on an impish look.

"Take your shoe off again
For this is your lucky day!
The nail will cost you a little bit.
To remove the toe, a little more you pay.

jhs