HERE'S A RITIN FRUM OLD BEAR
FOR FEBRUARY 1999
Here's wat tyme it is in Dallus, Texus wear I live:
Hi, Evrybudy! This is Old Bear ritin 2 U agin and that's a pitcher of my nu gud frend named Wendy out on our front porch. Wendy cum all the way frum Injunana at Christmus tyme and me and my man lyked her real well so sed she culd stay 4 a purty long tyme if she wanted 2.
Kan U here the gud musik that is playin? The tune is sumpn kalled My Funny Valentine and I thought it wus abowt sumbudy who got sent a Happy Valumtyme Day kard that sed sumpn funny lyke "Roses are red, violets are blue! You be my valentine or I'll hit you!". But my man sed, no it wusn't abowt that at all. Best he knew it wus a song rit by Mr. Chet Baker back abowt 1937 that wus a man singing abowt his gud girl frend or maybe his wyfe who he loved a hole lot who made him smyle whenever he wus close to her or thot about her. My man sez he mite get a SEE DEE that has this song on it sew we kan hear the wurds.
Here's a little calendar that my man made sew U won't forget the special days that cum in February. He didn't no how 2 print 'President's Day' on February 15 and "Ash Wednesday" and culdn't find no pitchers 4 them so he just made the numbers red sew you will no they are speshul days. I feel sorta bad when I ask my man 2 du things lyke make a calendar cus mostly he don't know how 2 du it very gud but he wurks reel hard and finally says 'here it is.. take it or leave it'. I bet he wurked 5 or 4 hours makin this calendar 4 me.
I asked him wat he wuld show and tell abowt next time and he said he had 2 things that wuld be pretty gud show and tell things. He said that one of them is a big stone that cum out of a castle in Wales and it is pretty histerical cus maybe a long, long time ago in wat is kalled meedyevil days sum famus king walked on that stone. He sez he bets it is a zillion years old.
He sez the other thing he's got 2 show and tell is a paper weight made of plastic that you can see through and see a piece of dirt. He sez that is probably a sample of the most importunt dirt in the wurld cus it is sum of the dirt that wus left over at a playce kalled TRINITY SITE in Nu Mexico after the first atomic bomb wus tested and made the wurld all differunt.
I guess those are purty gud things to show and tell abowt but I want 2 C wat Miss Wylene who goes to the same Retirement Club sed she wuld show and tell about. That's a little toy rockin horse with a broken head that is reel preshus 2 her.
Sum of U reed my aunt Judy's stories about WINDY INDY in my man's DURANGO DRIVE NEWS ONLINE and she shure kan tell sum funny things about wat happens 2 her and my Uncle Marty. Well, she sent us a story abowt wat happened 2 her and her kompewter the other day. My man sed I culd put it here cus everybudy who reeds my ritin has a kompewter. Here it is 4 u to laff at:
Well yesterday I went about trying to
delete your old address from the address book thing on the computer and put
in your new one. Well after some time working at it I was so proud of
myself!! Now your saying "Big Deal". Hey for someone who doesn't know what
the heck she's doing it was a real big deal! Well as I sat back and saw
what I'd done and was so pleased with myself I thought I'll send you and
E-mail and tell you just how wonderful I was and what I'd done all by
myself. This is where the fun began! I'll also thought I was so smart that by
now there wasn't anything I couldn't do on this machine.Well I was wrong!!
This darn machine is way smarter then I am! I hate that!
I tried to change
the address on that letter I've been trying to send you since Jan 7th!! Well
after many trys it worked or so I thought and boy then I really had a big
head!! Well I sent it and it came back to me after awhile. I had part of the
address still wrong so ok do it again right? Well I went to compose another
E-mail letter and I'd lost the Two buttons I always use!!! Now I was so upset
and couldn't find them!! The two buttons were the Address Book and the Send
button!! Now where did they go, I couldn't find those darn things anywhere!!
I hate this smart machine!! So for three hours I went over everything again
and again until I said ok I give up thinking the machine would say here I'll
give them back to you. Well that didn't happen either! It had me upset all
afternoon. I did however find another way to send mail and to get to the
address book thing but it took much longer this way and I didn't like it
this way and wanted it back the way it was before the machine wanted to play
hide and seek with me!!
When Marty came home I said to him I lost my Send
Button and My Address Book from the computer and will you find them for me?
He
laughed and said come on I'll show you and you must of hit a button and its
there somewhere. Oh sure it was I thought! So I tried to tell him all that
I'd done to this machine with a brain and he went through a couple things
and hit one button and there it was!!! Lord was I happy to see my Send
Button and My Address Button again!!! I love those buttons and need those
buttons!! Gosh you'd of thought I'd won the lotto, well to me it was Ha!Ha!
That darn machine anyhow!!
I guess I must of pressed something while in the
File or the Edit place, let me tell you I was into every spot on this
computer looking for my lost buttons!! They sure hide from me great!! See I
told you this darn machine has a mind of it's own!! Thats scarey isn't it?
And Marty said "you can't mess up this machine" Oh ya, I'll show you ! Yes I
can and did! I lost two buttons!!
So now I have my two buttons and I'm so
happy to have them and won't any time soon be changing an address I'll let
Marty do it!
